Fourth Quarantine

I wanted to tell him a story about my heart
actual heart & in this story it will not kill me
& the story will stretch out long & without edges
to unspool every day into a life we shared

but in new york my fear of dying presses me
for days into myself sunless & hoarse
presses me to my matted bed i emerge
blinking in the forgotten light & descend
into the subway & maybe today my blood
again will tire before its full rotation through
my body & maybe today i again cannot
hold myself & melt as if i have no bones
only a stranger’s arms cupped
to catch my spill

& if strangers make up the thin wall
between living & succumbing to my weary blood
then maybe i will not live & instead i send my love
away mourn him first then mourn myself

Safia Elhillo is a Sudanese-American poet famous for her written and spoken poetry. Elhillo received a BA from the Gallatain School at New York University and an MFA in poetry from The New School. Elhillo is best known for her slam poetry performances and has performed all around the world. Elhillo has been praised for her work and has been the recipient of several prestigious poetry awards. Elhillo has shared the stage with notable poets such as Sonia Sanchez and currently teaches at Split This Rock